Sayang Camp

Just back from Sayang(Love) Camp! =)

Sayang Camp is basically a camp where all the campers love each other, and by the final day, we all end up in couples after deciding who loved each other best. =D Where else do you think the word 'Sayang' originated from?

In Greek, 'eros' means (according to Wikipedia), 'passionate love, with sensual desire and longing'.

Ok ok, enough nonsense. Forgive my brainless bantering, I'm sick. No, not sick in the mind, but physically sick. Flu, cough, blocked ears. So do forgive me if I type a lil' bit of nonsense here and there.

I've been on a self-imposed exile(in my room) the whole day after I returned home from camp. Can't get dad sick, but I think he caught the bug already. =( Chemo will have to be delayed if he's sick.. and I will feel guilty for that. Ok, kidding, I know I can't control that, but of course I'll try to keep the virus between me and my four walls. *Little bit impossible only mah*

Anyway, Sayang Camp was good for the soul(mine, at least). A getaway, albeit a short one. Despite the fact that I was sick the entire camp, had blocked ears and flu the entire time, it was a refreshing camp.

At the same time, it reopened 'healed' wounds, so to speak. I thought I was done and over with hurting, but camp showed me I was seriously delusional if I ever believed that. Lately I feel so so so vulnerable before God, and Sayang Camp just reinforced that feeling.

James 1:2-3 says:
2 My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, 3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.

To count it all joy. You know, someday I want to meet all these followers of Christ and have one serious chat with them. How can they possibly rejoice in the midst of tribulation??? They suffered so much, probably more than any of us will ever go through for Christ, myself included, and yet they rejoiced in the midst of it all. How?? Lord, show me how, please?

But you know what?

After everything, I find it impossible to give God up. He has been so so so gracious to me, despite every blow inflicted upon me I feel His peace. Many times I despaired and cried out to Him, and He has always responded in His own gentle way. No way can I give God up, especially after all He has done for me. My greatest fear has always been that I would give up running the race, but for now, I'm still in the race, maybe with some injuries here and there, but going stronger in spite of it all.

God is a God of impossibilities! =)

And best of all, He has seen fit to prove it to me! =) =D