14th July flew by

Well, this day flew by. I was too busy with starting of uni life last year to post on the 14th of July, and somehow was too caught up with things to post this year too. Since this post...

Anyhow, life's pretty much changed since that post. That post was written when I was 18... I still wish I had the chance to fully explore the meaning of being 18, really. It's as if I skipped a phase of life every teenager is supposed to experience. Now it's too late to relive an 18 year old's life, life just will not permit it.

But anyway, well ko, life's pretty much... life these days. The up days, the down days, the joyful days, the painful days.

I do think of you many times though... you'd be 28 this year! Heck, that's OLD. =P

Anyway, looking at the current world situation these days, I just may meet you again very soon... end of the world is coming, dude! European countries are collapsing, currencies are collapsing, debts are increasing, people are working harder and harder to earn money that feeds so much less than before, earthquake after earthquake, storms that kill people...

Sometimes I look at life and just wonder.....

That aside, I visited our grandparents yesterday.. and my heart broke for them. Life's tough but my hands are tied. :-( Grandma cried again... again, I look at them, and wonder about life. Do the joyful days outweigh the painful days and memories??? Nonetheless, grandma's face lit up with joy when she saw us, and it's joy like that that perhaps convinces me that there is hope, after all.

There are times when I'm full of hopes and dreams for this life... and times when I wonder, what's the point of it all? Why bother?

However, like always, too much depends on me to ever think about giving up. Life's a race, and tiring as it may be, I've learnt resilience along the way.

Hmm, hope I've not been too depressing, ko! Life's really kinda good now, it is...

You'd like Joash, I'm sure! :-)

That's all for now, have a good time up there! :-)

Your adorable sister. ;-)

Spiritual Matters

Like every human being, I struggle with spiritual issues... based on what I see around me, what I think, how people around me act...

I see Christians lying and cheating their way through life to achieve their goals.

I see Christians who spew out vulgarities and expletives as if these were the first words they learnt.

I see Christians misusing God's name to explain their choices in life.

I see Christians flying into rages and fits of anger when circumstances make them upset.

I see Christians sneering at the happiness of others, and rejoicing at the misfortune of others.

I see Christians loving less-fortunate strangers more than their own families and friends.

I see Christians harbouring jealousy at the success of others and envying the riches of others.

I see Christians breaking nearly/all the 10 commandments without a tinge of guilt.

I see Christians lying to their loved ones without a hint of remorse.

I see Christians giving their word and promises without any intention of fulfilling them.

I see Christians going through life without a care for those hurting around them.

I see Christians fooling around with life as if there is no God.

I see Christians leaving the faith they have been brought up in simply because they see other Christians doing the above.

I see non-Christians having no qualms about joining the Christian faith because they can lead the secular life they've led all their lives, but this new life includes a ticket to heaven.

I see non-Christians having absolutely no interest in the Christian faith because their Christian friends are no different from the world.

Are YOU in any of the above?

(I've been in several of those categories many times)

I've always believed that a Christian must bear GOOD fruits (not rotten fruits like the above..) if they are truly following their faith. Whether it's fruits of the spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control) or fruits of gaining new believers (who would have joined because they see something special in you).

If you've noticed I've included lying twice.. haha, can't help it.. if it's one thing I absolutely detest, it's blatant lying. Covering up, avoiding, I'm still not so annoyed... but blatant, outright lying I CANNOT stand. Guess that's one of the traits I inherited from good ol' dad. Hehe.

Christians who constantly use God's name in explaining decisions also irritate me. I feel that you're demeaning our heavenly Father each time you use His name, especially in petty issues. Oh, and if that decision later on proves to be wrong and you yet again fumble to come up with another 'Godly' explanation to explain your newest decision to 'cover up' your previous mistake... hmmm, I know many Christians who use God's name when they wish to break-up with their partners. Guess it's a convenient reason/excuse to use so your partner cannot give you too much hell... how can God be wrong, after all? (Although if your partner isn't that strong a Christian to see right through your reasoning her/his faith may very well be deeply shaken. So please, be warned, DO NOT use this explanation unless it's mutual, and your partner can tell you the same.)

Anyway, I had a good long talk with a friend over lunch recently, and I brought up certain spiritual issues which I've been harbouring within myself for a long time. While it was a relief to finally voice it out to someone whom I could trust, I didn't receive the exact answers I was hoping for. Still, I felt good after talking to her about it. :-)

My perspectives of things have been changing, but whether to a better direction or not, I'm not sure.

Anyhow, what a speaker recently said which struck me was this: Do not look at all the faults and flaws of your leader. Because if we look at them purely through human eyes, they will NEVER measure up to our idea of a 'perfect leader'. Instead, look at them from this perspective: How can God use him/her?

Pretty true, too often I have found myself judging leaders and disrespecting their decisions because I see their human flaws and deem them incapable of leading. It's a rather tough perspective to change, but I am trying to, day by day.

Just some food for thought. =) I've been busy with some paperwork, helping translate stuff for my guitar teacher, keying in data for mum, practising guitar... Kiara!

Been going to Kiara 2/3 times a week... mum asked me, "Why you keep going??" Me: It's addictive. Once I've built up my stamina I don't want it to drop. The bf in total contrast asked, "Why not go everyday?? Why alternate days only?" Me: If I go everyday I'll start to hate it.

Hehe. I need another sport lah. Kiara is so darn boring. Although I can now jog nearly the whole 40 minutes. =D When I first started I couldn't even walk without resting. *Looking for my badminton kakis*

Have a blessed week!

God bless,

Jo

I find it...

... disgusting when I see photos or read about how children, some even toddlers, are brought to political rallies by their parents/family.

Not only do you expose a young innocent life to the (possible) dangers of a chaotic, uncontrollable situation, but you're brainwashing your kid before he/she has had a chance to decide on his/her own stands in life.

Then again, all parents brainwash their kids for something or other. haha. So that's a pretty lame argument.

Well, I still find it disgusting anyway. =P

Had a good night out with the other half yesterday, been a long time (months! Since... I really don't know when. Before my hectic gilar semester???) since we've had the chance to date like that. :-) Had dinner with the bro-in-law and besan! Hehe, good dinner, good time of fellowship.. then the both of us did some walking around, saw a movie (Hanna, the brilliant assassin!). Oh oh, and he bought me earrings! =D Round smileys! Like: =) on round shaped earrings! hehehe. Sooo cute.

Was talking to the boyfriend a few days ago... and hmm hmm guess there are things that we cannot expect our closest friends to understand about our individual lives. Because we all go through different challenges... and many a time, we're alone when in pain, when everyone around us think that our worlds are perfect and problem-free.

Especially when you're not the type to wail about your life problems to others.

*Yet another vague, confusing post by yours truly*

Last Sunday the Powerkids had a birthday celebration! And I blew 24 balloons! (Too big, they kept popping and people kept jumping during service. -_-) Haha. Oh, the simple joys of life. We had an overabundance of food for lunch as a result, so most people got to pack home plenty of food for their dinner. Hehe. I like house church plenty, the fellowship is so warm and close-knitted.. people stay to talk till 2pm+ at times! (Service ends about 11.45am... that's a good 2+ hours of fellowship!) I do miss the friends who are spread out all over in the other 3 house churches though.. feels as if I hardly see them anymore.

Have a blessed week ahead of you! =)

God bless,

Jo

Loooove

Well well hello hello, why not touch on the topic of... LOOOOVE today? ;-)

Ok, my take on love, rather. Like individual personalities, every relationship is different.

What's there to say, really?

I was never one to have an ideal idea about love. Heck, I was a skeptic on relationships ever since young. I've always told others, better to be happy single than unhappy married to someone you cannot live with. (And this is something I still believe in. Don't simply marry the next guy proposing to you!)

When Joash first started chasing... I didn't run. Well, not very hard, anyway. =P But I DID wait for him to lose interest in me. Like I mentioned, I was a skeptic on love.

2 months - Eh, he's still interested. Hmmm. (And so am I!)

3 months - Hey, this guy IS serious after all. (Maybe I can actually hope for a future with him..!)

And yeah, blablabla, well, suffice to say, I'm no longer that much a skeptic on love. As I've learnt, relationships need working on to constantly move forward, and although it may be challenging at times, (when you're all stressed out or facing some serious attack of PMS... Females, BE WARNED.. In fact, I've a theory that most guys are probably dumped at the height of their gfs' PMS. LOL!) a healthy, happy relationship makes everything worth it. :-)

Ideals for the perfect guy/gal... I hear it all the time... no such thing. Guys and girls are wired very, very, very differently, so to expect someone of the opposite gender to live up to YOUR 'perfect' standards is basically rubbish. Sure, standard characteristics like gentlemanly, polite, responsible etc etc are good standards to uphold. But every responsible gentleman has his flaw, just as every female has PMS. (Oh my, what a comparison.)

You ask me honestly what every relationship MUST have to survive, I think the answer is straightforward and simple.

LOVE.

Don't ever settle for someone who doesn't love you. And don't ever settle for someone you do not love. It'll be unfair to yourselves, your future children, and all those who will be affected by your turbulent/stagnant relationship.

In a relationship where there is true love, both parties will work hard to please each other and resolve conflicts. Both parties will try to change for the better if they truly love each other. Most importantly, two people who truly love each other will thrive to bring out the best in their relationship so that each other is happy. And it's easier to love more when you're happy! =D

And no, love isn't instant. Starts with interest, getting to know each other, liking each other.. and deepening the relationship if both parties are willing to risk their hearts for one another. Couples I admire are couples who have been through all the obstacles that life can provide and still emerge victorious, together.

A teacher whom I respect very much once told me never to go after a guy who is currently in a relationship. If he dumps his current GF because of you, what makes you think he won't do the same to YOU? Something I agree wholeheartedly with. I've got little respect for guys/gals who dump their partners for someone 'better'. Barring that the relationship was already undergoing massive troubles which can't seem to be sorted out. But dumping someone for someone else 'better' is just plain disgusting in my eyes. If you disagree, hey it's MY blog. ;-) You may stop reading right here.

Another thing I'm against is going back to the person who dumped you. Heck ya this may be a touch idealistic. But I am. If the person who dumped who 'fell out of love' with you once, why won't he/she do it again? Why grovel your way back to their hearts? For how long? Once a trust like that is broken, it's hard to mend it back properly. It's something I told Joash quite early on... I told him that if either one of us dumps each other, obviously one party isn't worth the other no matter how much it hurts (your guess: dumper or dumpee ;-)).

Don't get excited, no one is dumping anyone here. Haha. Just examples. :-)

One thing I'm grateful for is that I've never been heartbroken. I cannot imagine the pain and anguish heartbreak brings, and trust me I'm in no hurry to experience it. ;-) Up till Joash, I've guarded my heart so very carefully, even paranoidly, I've never had to experience heartbreak.

Final parting words... don't be in a rush to find someone. But at the same time, don't be afraid to explore. ;-) While you're single, go out with whoever and whomever you wish, you never know whose hidden gem (within) your once-blinded eyes will be opened to.

Final finally... don't ever play with someone's heart. When you're talking about relationship, you're talking about a person's heart. Someone who has entrusted you wholeheartedly with their heart, and if you decide to crush that heart there'll always be a permanent scar on that heart. Don't give away your heart too quickly, hold back with caution until you're pretty darn sure the person you're about to give it away to can be trusted to love and treasure your heart for life. No guarantees in life, but being cautious is always safer. :-)

With all that being said, don't listen to me, really. Hahaha. Maybe in 30 years time I'll look back at this post and laugh at the sheer idealistic and ludicrous ideas I had. ;-)

However, being the young, innocent and hopeful 20 year old I am right now, as of today, I've absolutely no qualms about declaring that I'm very much in love with a man (who incidentally just smsed me accusing me of 'kutuking' him in this post! HAHA!) who spends his days working very hard towards OUR future. :-)

A man who strives to do well in studies, to build a successful business, a man who loves God, his family and mine, who lacks sleep nearly all the time because of work & studies, and who loves me for who I am. What more can I ask for? :-)

Actually, I'm asking for a lot of things. To teach me to ride a motorbike. For him to get more sleep. For a nice long honeymoon to some beautiful island. For the flexibility of being able to work at my own leisure next time. hahaha! Aiyo, so demanding la..

Naw I'm not that demanding.

Love keeps us both more than happy. =)

Haha, it's late and I'm exhausted. Have a blessed day!

God bless,

Jo

Looking for better phone plans

Been browsing for phone plans with better value-for-money... the best one I've found is Digi's iPhone plan.

But the iPhone itself is so freaking expensive. -_- Not to mention its lack of Flash capabilities thanks to its creator's ego.

How?

The hubby needs a better plan too in order to keep up with his rapidly-expanding business. His current using of the RM80 Samsung phone can't offer him anything much.

*Keeps looking*

Haha just randomly blogging. Have a wonderful week!

Food for thought

"...aku juz nk tanah melayu bertuankan melayu..."

Was reading some FB updates, saw this comment.

Hmmm...

A Call to Anguish - David Wilkerson

This video was shown in church some months back, and Wai Yan recently reposted it again on Facebook, reminding me about it.



Anguish - Have you ever felt it? The complete absolute destruction of your heart? Everything within you has been obliterated, destroyed, broken?

3:35 - Does it matter about the Jerusalem that is in our own hearts? The sign of ruin that is slowly draining spiritual power and passion. Blind to lukewarmness, blind to the mixture that is creeping in. That's all the devil wants to do. Is to GET THE FIGHT OUT OF YOU. And KILL IT. So you won't labour in prayer anymore. So you won't weep before God anymore.

5:40 - There is going to be no renewal, no revival, no awakening, until we are once again willing to let him break us.

6:16 - I've wanted it easy. I just wanted to be happy.

I've felt anguish. I've felt pain. Brokenness, despair, sorrow, you name it.

But it's always been for myself, about myself. Anguish for someone else? Hmm. Concerned, yes. Pity, yes. But anguish?? WHY would I want to feel it again? I think I've successfully numbed myself to plenty of things. Plug in the holes and the pain stops. Yeah, easy as that.

And yet David Wilkerson's powerful and (charismatic) message can -almost- strike me to my heart's core.

It's been far too long. I've abandoned important things for far too long in my quest to avoid pain..

Have a blessed day!
Jo

P.S. Btw, David Wilkerson died in a car crash on April 27, 2011. Gruesome but quick way to leave earth, me thinks.