Christi...

Last week I was catching up with an old friend (Vic, one of my friends in lower secondary days whom I think I blogged plenty about in those days) and a couple of new friends.

Out of curiosity I brought up the idea of Christianity, because I remember this particular friend had so very many questions about God in our younger days. (And leaving us young 'uns to answer to such deep concepts wasn't exactly the wisest thing to do.)

Of course, 'twas hardly a surprise to me when she proudly proclaimed to be an agnostic (in other words, a more intelligent version of her younger days of wondering if there was a god). Haha. We talked about various types of beliefs for a bit (no, I'm not one to shove doctrine down your throat, I've learnt the hard way that it FAILS, big time.) and it was a pretty enlightening chat. What struck a chord in me was her friend. She laughingly gestured to her friend and said, "He was actually in the CF committee last time!!!" to which he quickly shut her up and covered up for the piece of rather embarrassing info with vulgarities. And we talked about others who 'used to' be active in various CFs... mostly past tense, however.

What was the most disturbing (for me) was a guy they brought up. He seemed like a character I wouldn't want to know (because he was a bully, and brought bullying into university level. Obviously he never outgrew his sick desire to make others feel pathetic.)... but according to his friends, this particular guy was actually a FOUNDER of a school CF in his secondary school days.

Which was pretty surprising to me. I've served in CFs so long, I know how tiring and horrible an experience it must be to go against all the rules, regulations and authorities in order to start up a school CF. It takes faith SO STRONG I myself can't imagine it. But that was history, for that guy. Now that triumphant victory for the KOG would be another piece of 'embarrassing info' for him.

And that's just so discouraging and saddening to hear about.

Still, that's life. I keep looking back at stories like these... and wonder if my turn will arrive... To be so passionate for Christ at one point of life, and to lose faith in it all later on..

I've had my dry spells I admit, but thank God for closer Christian friends who are sharp enough to spot it and to keep me going. :-) It's at times like these that I remember why God created a COMMUNITY for us. He knows we can't survive alone. But anyway, it's something we should all ponder upon, eh?

(And I'm ok, no need to bombard me with "Are you ok!!!" questions. =P Just giving a voice to my thoughts.)

Yesterday I had an awesome birthday dinner with my wonderful coursemates. Hehe. 'Twas good to just sit back and relax with them, haven't done that in such a long time! To another fantastic 2.5 years with you peeps! =)

After that I met up with my PKVians in Desa Park City, and that was awesome too. Hehe. Putting aside all worries and thoughts about life, responsibilities etc, just hanging out with them. Haha. After making each person giddy on the funny equipments, we sat down and had a singing session! The songs ranged from love songs to Christmas carols to I don't know what other songs.

And today I spent my afternoon with my dear man, who works so hard I think he needs a break from life. Followed him to MMU! Hehehe. Ate Arab food with him... *deciding if that was lunch or dinner* Was good food, and he thanked me profusely for belanja-ing him! =P Left him later in the evening so he could continue working.. <3

And that's about all, have a good day k!

God bless,

Jo

(Eh, if I become like one of those people I mentioned I'll stop typing 'God bless'! -__-)

Updates Updates

Hey hey, I've neglected my blog for a pretty long time..

Poor fella.

Anyway, what's been going on...

I've been meaning to, but just never got around it.

RIP Grandpa.

Dad's dad. He passed away on the 23rd of September, around 2pm. Mum and bro went back to Malacca first, and I went back with Joash after his exam paper the next day.

For those of you who didn't know, I'd been going back to Malacca more frequently before he passed away because he was very weak (which accounted for my exhausting first few weeks of lectures, weekends spent in Malacca), and I decided that making amends with that side of the family was a must. Enough of cold shoulders and silence between us, life's short enough that we can't keep doing that. People seemed rather apologetic on that side, though nothing can alleviate what they threw onto us, a family who'd just lost a husband and a father.

I'm blogging in a rather cryptic manner, aren't I. Oh well.

Anyway, granddad passed away peacefully, and the few weeks prior to his passing he'd been gradually getting weaker, and his state so much reminded me of dad in HIS last days it was quite, quite painful to endure. At least grandpa left in a much less painful manner... And I had a good chat with him the last time I visited him. (I did think of visiting him the week before he passed away but I never did, I should have... but. Oh well. I didn't, and that's that.)

Grandma, poor ol' grandma... I could only put my arm around her tiny frame as she sobbed her eyes out.. death, such a painful thing... death... life... death....

I remember what someone told me. And I've probably blogged it before. But just gotta repeat it. "We're not afraid of dying because we know where we're heading. But we live healthily because we care and love those who will be left behind, how they will hurt and suffer if we die." (This lady gestured to her young daughter as she said it.) Well, maybe it wasn't said in those exact words, but that's the gist of it. And each time I reflect back on those words, I wish everyone had the same unselfish love for others as this woman had. So many people today live for themselves... I suppose I've seen so so many people wail, despair and sob their eyes out (and I myself having endured all sorts of terrible pain) when their loved ones die... I simply don't understand how people can still be selfish.

During a poem discussion in class sometime ago, my lecturer asked if any of us had seen a grown man cry. She called it an "unnatural" and some other words along that line. I bitterly smiled as I had flashbacks of how many grown men I've seen cry. From young, working men to old, white-haired retired Datuks. And no, I don't think any less of men who cry. Life's a huge ball of sorrow at times, and only a stone-heart would keep tears in check.

Was supposed to blog more, but after typing all these my mind's gone all confuddled so I'm afraid I can't go on.. haha.

Anyway, really, life's good, just busy busy busy. And I've decided to make a comeback to badminton... haha... been away far too long, it's been tingling my nerves. The UM badminton captain asked me to train with the team... after declining for 2 whole semesters, I've decided to shove all cowardice aside, and join them. Hahaha. *Prepared to be the weakest player on the team* There are national back-up players on the team! -__-

Which is why I'm forcing CP to play badminton with me this weekend, I need to get a feel of the racquet after centuries of not playing! If I'm gonna embarrass myself on court alongside national players, I'm gonna do it in style! =P

Anyway, tired now,

God bless,

Jo

Sexaaay

SX Acoustic Guitar Traveller TG1

=D

My dearest man bought this for me on the 28th of September 2011! =D (It comes with the gig bag tailored to its size!)

Haha I gave the date because we celebrated our one year of dating! Yep, it's been that fast, time flies. Ok la, not exactly 28 Sep, I don't remember the exact date of the first date... and I doubt Joash remembers either. LOL. Guess we didn't bother remembering because we both didn't want to get our hopes to high for fear of hurting our hearts.

But one year down the road, and we're doing well. :-) Extremely well, really. =)

Say hello to... *no name yet* Hmm... Sexy, perhaps?

Haha! It's the cutest nicest guitar I've ever had and held! =D It's super cute, 580mm =D Next to jumbo-sized guitars this is like a baby.

Yeah, I'm a sucker for cute things.

All thanks to Mr. Joash Low who took time off from work, drove all the way to PJ Old Town and found this shop which looked like a store room.. but contained a gem inside. ;-)

Bro (who doesn't give 2 hoots about music) took a look at this guitar and asked, "What in the world is that!" :-) It's THAT cute. =P

Now if I only I can learn to strum properly...

That's why I'm learning Elementary Guitar as my co-curricular subject!

Hehe. It's been pretty useful thus far, I hope I have half-decent strumming by the end of this sem.

People say as a classical guitar player I should be able to strum since it's easier. Er... I dunno why la, cannot.. my guitar teacher taught me the 'universal strumming pattern' long ago but that's about the only strum I know, I seem retarded when it comes to improvising. :(

But ANYWAY, that's beside the point. The point is, I have the world's cutest guitar thanks to my love!

=)

It's been a wonderful one year, I've learnt a lot about loving in this one year... =) And many more years to come, eh? ;-)

Till the next inspiring post,

Jo

*Pengsan*

And this week has ended....

And I'm still alive!!!!

Barely. LOL.

I have walked and climbed so many many many flights of stairs the past few days that I think I've lost some weight!

Been sleeping 4-5 hours each night since Saturday night! And NO TIME for any afternoon naps. Monday-Thursday been waking up at 7.30am (I overslept on Tuesday though LOL most important day, 8.15am) and staying in campus till 8pm.. yesterday 11.30pm! Cause of our PKV's MSK (Malam Suai Kenal).

By this morning, when I dragged this wretched body up, it was so so so exhausted, but it felt like a broken-in horse. There was no more fight within to sleep, it just wearily KNEW that it HAD to get up and get on with life, no arguments, no compromises. Hahaha.

Only thing that kept me going was the fact that it would end soon! =D

A few nights ago I was so so so discouraged and tired and weary and stressed-out I felt like the world should have just ended. (Not to mention that Joash's line got cut due to Celcom's big blunder so there wasn't much he could do from where he was.) Thank God for a God-sent friend, Grace! She attempted to alleviate all my suicidal thoughts.. I wanted to resign from life that night. LOL. (My family didn't help much either, they added to my stress by nagging. Zzz.) Later on I attributed it to PMS because I finally thought I should WRITE down all the things which were stressing me out... and found the paper blank. Hahaha. -__-

I was in charge of PKV booth the past few days, it's about promoting PKV to campus students. And I had to be there to set things up each morning, and then pack things up. And to ensure that the booth had attendants there all the time, 9am-5pm. And today I had to find people to send to some nonsensical ceramah, all societies had to send people. I couldn't make it, but I managed to find some willing victims =D

Anyway, what really lifted my rather discouraged self was the number of first years who attended last night's MSK. I looked at the crowd and marveled at the fact that we didn't even have enough chairs! It just reminded me that all my work of going back and forth to HEP (Hal Ehwal Pelajar) in UM during the holidays and after the holidays to get paperwork settled was worth it. :-) It was a satisfactory feeling, and I'm very very glad to have met so many juniors (who were so so lost and were attempting to find people who could help them get their bearings right in UM).

And of course, church. So many of them were looking for churches to attend, having left their home churches back in their respective hometowns. Nothing more encouraging than to see young people these days eagerly looking for churches to attend...

So I think, despite everything that ever discouraged me, despite people around me who have discouraged and perhaps even affected my faith with their cynical point of views...

Lately I've been finding my old self again, the days before I hardened my heart. And it has been a gentle reminder of who I need to become again. Last Sunday I was realized the need to love others unceasingly, to love even if it hurts/inconveniences me. Because that's exactly the kind of love Christ had for us. No more selfish love, giving as much as I receive.

The past few days has been a fresh boost of encouragement + energy and reminds me that everything I do does not equal to nothing, and that I am still running the race, albeit in an exhausted manner due to circumstances. Running the race is mostly a very lonely journey, usually with discouragement/sneers/scorn instead of cheers from people around me. (I'm a 'good girl' and 'goody-two-shoes' and whatever other goody goody term you can find for me.) But despite having considered dropping out of the race many many times, His Grace has been sufficient for me to keep me going. And for that I'm grateful. :-) All we need to keep going at times is encouragement and support, to know that our work and sacrifice is worthwhile for other lives. :-)

Anyway, just a song that I hope I can live up to someday.

Have a very good, blessed weekend. I'm too brain-dead to continue.

God bless!

Jo

2nd day of sem!

Ok, since I just reread my last post, grandpa is doing fine, weak but still strong enough to talk about plenty of nonsense. I had to counsel him -__- ! Haha, long story. But so far, still ok. Grandma's love for him is amazing. Each time I look at him in his current frail condition, I'm reminded of dad in his final stage of life... but anyway, not gonna delve into that!

Sem started yesterday, and as usual my nicely planned out schedule had to be rudely disrupted by this and that... 2 of my Asia Tenggara courses may be 'shut down' because... there was only 1 student who showed up for it. Guess who? ME lah. I mean, I like small classes and all, but really, ONE on ONE is really NOT my cup of tea. Anyway, UM won't allow a class of 1. They are both about politics... the lecturer, an Indonesian was telling me about how students in Indonesia fight for places in courses dealing with politics, but in UM practically NOBODY wants to study it. Zzz.

Anyway, managed to find some friends who were planning to take one of the courses but they had to rearrange the timing... so I will most likely drop 1, and maintain the class they wanna take.

Slept over at Yan's hostel yesterday after meeting some juniors.. PKV's annual 'junior visitation' (JV). Since she had early morning class (8am..!) this morning, I dragged my weary body up too.. but it was a very good thing!

Because while I sleepily waited around campus for the office to open (had to settle PKV stuff. Welcome to the secretary's ass' world. I've been running around so much for ONE event - ironically I'm not even a committee member of this event!), I decided, out of sheer randomness.. to check what empty slots were left for co-curricular courses. I've been targeting Elementary Guitar (because I want something non-stressful and they apparently teach you strumming, something I'm quite a failure in. I can play Bach/Carcassi/Tarrega/blablabla but I can't strum properly. -__-) since I first found out about it but the 40 places were snapped in the the first 45 minutes our seniors were allowed to register. (Seniors get priority.....) So obviously no hope to get one la.

BUT.

Lo and behold, when I looked at the empty slots this morning, I saw '1' for Elementary Guitar!!! I was in complete disbelief, some kind fella had dropped that precious, coveted spot (for me!). So without further ado, I dropped my Asia Tenggara course (which I can always add back if I ever want to because obviously NO ONE is rushing for it) and signed up for guitar.

Hehe.

Then I went to settle HEP (Hal Ehwal Pelajar) stuff, spent 2-3 hours of my morning on my feet, walking up and down flights and flights of stairs, walking in the sun... with a heavy bag because I had my stuff from my sleepover at Yan's room. Zzz. Tried to look for the guitar class place, couldn't find it, walked all over, was sent on a wild goose chase by a music student. -__- Finally called up the music department only to be redirected to another department. After some waiting, they told me it was located in the Engineering faculty.

ENGINEERING faculty.

'Twas on the tip of my tongue to ask WHY in the FREAKING WORLD would a guitar class be held among future engineers, but I just thanked the lady politely and hung up. Had no car today because Joash so kindly sent me by superbike to campus yesterday evening, peak of jam hour. So I did something I've never done in my whole entire life. I took a taxi home alone. Normally I don't trust taxis and I much prefer LRTs and buses although they usually involved a lot more walking. But today, I was just too hot and tired and sticky and sweaty to think of any other solution. All I knew was that by 11.15am, I just wanted/needed a good bath and to stop walking. Had no class on apart from the guitar class which I'd just signed up for, and that was in the evening.

So I did just that. :-) Rested, my man dropped by a short while because he was around the area dealing with some customers. Went back to uni by 5.30pm, went to engineering fac, and couldn't find the place. Haha, thank God for awesome engineering friends who guided my way! (Since I don't think they read my blog no need to put names la.) Learnt nothing, as usual, first class. Then went to fetch some friends and juniors for JV (diff colleges from yesterday).

Had a very, very, very good getting to know session with them, and was glad to offer whatever help they needed with regards to UM. I know the feeling of being totally, completely lost in this whole new world, so I was glad to offer help to them. Last year my college was somehow missed out from JV, so I never got the answers to my queries at that time.

And I got approached by a cult today. So that just gave me all the more new 'semangat' to ensure the first years settle into decent churches and had a strong body of Christ to belong to in campus. :-)

Too tired, God bless,

Jo

CCU

Grandpa's in CCU, gotta make a last min trip to Melaka today... had to cancel all my appointments on for today (today was supposed to be a full day).

I'll be driving the family back, hope the rain stops soon!

Till the next post,

God bless.

=D

Happy Mappy!

Hahaha =P

Anyway, forgot to blog about my Kuantan trip. It was really good, good break for the whole family, Joash included. :-) (Although he spent so much time sleeping!) We just stayed around the hotel, used the facilities, gym, swimming pool, arcade, and buffet of course. =D And since our hotel was at the beach, we beached too!

Went to Teluk Cempedak, felt so happy at the beach. Didn't care two hoots about the scorching sun, just played water. =) I want to own a resort by the beach! Ok la, house also can. Must be east coast side cause west coast is just too dirty and polluted and small waved.

The in-laws gave us a dinner, and it was a good dinner + a good time of fellowship. Muh family returned to PJ after 3 days, I spent an extra day over in the hubby's home. Twas good fellowship, hmm.. learnt a lot about fishes. Haha! Uncle George (dad-in-law) showed me the birth cert of... an AROWANA fish. -__- Would you believe that?? I told Joash that it was nicer than HIS birth cert. Lol.

His cute parents brought us out for a sumptuous dinner at... T&L, something like that. We had everything-ikan bakar, char kuey teow, curry wild boar, rojak, coconut, sugarcane.. felt so pressured to eat. PRESSURED TO EAT. Cause everything was so much and the men were eating so fast! Poor mum-in-law had to survive with 4 men chomping food around her all these years...

Spent most of my time in the house, apart from that dinner. Went for a walk around the neighbourhood, the atmosphere is so different from PJ's. :-) Partly because in PJ crime rate is so high I just don't feel safe walking around for fun. The ayang went rollicking with his friends while I slept! It's so good for him to have some stress-free lepak time =)

Aunty Kate as usual talked to me about serious issues.. =P Dad talking to me about fish and dogs and jungles, mum talking to me about health and relationship and family stuff. Good balance! Haha!

Anyway, it was a good trip to Kuantan, perhaps a wee bit too short.. *hint for a longer holiday in Kuantan syg ahem ahem*

That's all, nothing much really, just enjoyed my holiday. :-)

Will be starting 2nd year in a few days time, am excited to see what uni has to offer me this sem!

This afternoon I had a phone call from my PKV/CF president. It went like this:

TH: Mojojo, guess who!

Me: Er, Dawn??

TH: Huh! Who else calls you that name??

Me: A LOT of people.

blablabla *short talk aside*

TH: Eh Jo, remember ah, about our CGL (Cell Group Leaders) meeting next week?

Me: What? What? What meeting??

TH: You also forgot ah! ...

Me: Oh, kk, so it's next week ah? (At the back of my mind I'm furiously computing my involvement in this, I think all committee members have to attend it)

TH: Yes, it's the day before our mini CPR (Committee Planning Retreat)..

Me: HUH? What? What ah?? Mini CPR?? Next week??

TH: You forgot that too!

Me: Hahaha.... yeah....

(She obviously expected me to remember it all because I took down the minutes some months back.. *speechless*)

Just a stark reminder that uni life will be back in full swing very very soon!

Ok, light-hearted post today, have a blessed day ahead of you!

God bless,

Jo

2nd Year

I'll be starting my 2nd year of university next week...

Time flies, eh?

I still remember entering UM as a freshie last year, wondering what this new phase of life would bring me..

Feelings experienced at that time? Probably a bit of anxiety, I was venturing into a whole new area of life ALONE. I remember worrying about leaving mum alone at that time... during orientation week. We were still getting over dad's passing on, so naturally I worried about her and called home as frequently as orientation week would allow it.

Orientation was pretty ok, survivable, about the same level as IPDA's one. I think. Haha. Looking back la, but I'll never want to go through it again. Just not my cup of tea to be treated like a cow, herded and shouted at all the time.

How did my first year go?

Let's see.

I entered uni determined NOT to be involved in UM's CF/PKV (Persaudaraan Kristian Varsiti) because I wanted a break from it, after serving so many years in school CF. Haha.

Next thing I know, I'm secretary of PKV's annual camp. -_-

And yeah, I kinda got Wai Yan involved (who coincidentally was just as determined not to be active LOL).

Still, it was a good experience, good time of bonding, laughing. :-) Workload was a lot heavier... unlike schooling days, where I could hold a post and yet do nothing, only to find my work magically done for me. =P

Got involved in badminton, squash, debate... badminton and squash no big deal for me. Debate and emceeing, now those 2 were entirely new experiences for me, and good experiences they were too!

Hahaha. Emceeing for a 100 people function was fun, for a first-timer with absolutely no training whatsoever... 100 was a big enough crowd. =P

Debate was less fun, but learnt a lot. *Not that I want to debate again.*

Was asked to join UM's badminton team alongside them national players, but got too busy to join their training... so I backed off after a while. Hmm. We'll see how this sem goes.

I did represent my faculty and college in tournaments though, and that was fun. :-) I've made friends with the staff in several departments due to my representing them in tournaments (they even snuck me in as a 'staff' for a staff tournament once LOL), they've got friendly smiles each time I've got stuff to deal with them.

What else?

Music-wise, I've yet to see how their music department is like. By 2nd sem I had already shifted out of hostel so I never got an opportunity to see where my classical guitar playing stands amongst the rest. I'll find a way though. :-)

Academic wise? After my first week in uni, I told brother that I'd found my place in life. Haha, blogged about this before, but since this is the main gist of my 1st year, allow me to repeat it again. I felt like a fish in water right after I started uni. Kinda like how I pick up my badminton racquet and play a game after a long while... the "I am finally home" feeling is very very strong. :-)

I struggled with the concept of assignments for the first few months because I simply could not get into the habit of constantly studying/researching. I hated, detested that part. All my schooling years I've relied on last-minute studying to pull me through, and usually did poorly/was absent for monthly tests. So to suddenly have EVERY single piece of work I did week after week to be counted in my CGPA was darn stressful on my part.

I got used to it by 2nd semester, and griped less about it. I learnt to fret less over assignments, and began to enjoy them more. :-)

The most awesome thing about uni?

You can play all the time! Apart from dedicating some time for assignments, I was enjoying the rest of my time. Hahaha. Mum kept wondering how I could afford so much time just enjoying life, even in the midst of our 'study breaks'. And yet maintain my CGPA. It dropped from 4.00 to 3.97 from 1st sem to 2nd sem, but still pretty good considering the amount of time I spent on other activities (uni, badminton, church, guitar, lepaking, dating... the list goes on).

Hehe.

I packed this coming sem though, will have the heaviest combination of subjects ever, but I do want to do as many subjects as I can so that my final year is free.

*Takes a deep breath, readies meself to take on more subjects, spend more time on research!* The thing about my degree is that so so so much reading and researching and writing is required as compared to many other courses. Not that I'm complaining. :-)

So anyway, it's been a good first year. Joash has been an incredible companion throughout, and we're both grown and matured so much in the short time we've been dating.

Why, I was just telling Joash I could trace his 'growth'! Hahaha. When we first started out, he was a middleman for some biking shop. Then he started selling 2nd hand tyres. Then he started selling his personal belongings to buy machinery. As he used to tell me, "For the greater good." Then he started doing small-scale bike fixing stuff. After a while he decided to go big and set up his own workshop. :-) And it doesn't stop there, he's now expanding and offering more services.

It's incredible, the rate he just progresses. :-) I'm proud of all he has achieved, and still find it amazing that he has the strength and determination to persevere on even when HUGE obstacles come in the way! Huge and dangerous at times, eh my dear man? ;-)

Anyway, I'm going off-tangent. Haha. I'll begin next semester continuing my 2nd term as assistant secretary of PKV (no running away from secretarial work since young la, my face just screams "SECRETARY!!!" I think. :(), in charge of some PKV booth (which I still have no idea what to do...) and playing the keyboard for PKV's MSK (Malam Suai Kenal)... oh my, I need plenty of prayer..! Especially for the keyboard part. Haha I dislike being plugged in.. skill not enough. :( I'll sorely miss PKV's annual camp this sem though.. was supposed to be in charge of it but due to some probs it's off. Sigh. That was one thing I was looking forward to. Oh well, maybe it's about time I be sociable and join some FES camps. I will...

So that's pretty much it, here's a toast to a good 2nd year!! *Toasts* =P

God bless YOU, my dear reader!

Jo

...

And yet another ex-classmate gave birth and got married.

-_-

Oh well, that's life.

Am discovering all these through Facebook.

Cute babies though...

1 Utama!

1 Utama's Jusco has re-opened after its months of renovation! And there are new shops popping up. And old shops revamping and renovating. And Uniqlo is opening there too!

=D

Hahaha.

I sound like a shopaholic. I'm not one la, I just enjoy walking in 1 U. Hehe. Especially when I'm alone and have nothing to do. =) Usually end up buying nothing anyway, I just enjoy window shopping.

Guess 1U is something I grew up with, and my (extremely) poor sense of direction means that I'm not very adventurous. So I basically only know my way to the shopping malls closer to home.

I have been exploring Sunway Pyramid more frequently though, but still get lost there. Anyhow at the rate 1 U is expanding I really don't need Pyramid anymore. =)

And Tropicana (TCM) is so tiny, the first time I brought Joash there we rounded it 3 times and Joash had the whole place memorized by then. -_-

Sunway + TCM both have Ninja Joe's though... all 1 U needs now is a Ninja Joe's... *pork burger* Who knows, it may just open! =P

Had a good time in CG today =)

And I have a whole new load of books now!! Rachael was generous enough to give them away... =D *Happy happy* Thanks Rachael!

Random random. Holidays ain't doing my brain good.

Am glad I didn't sign up for ThePlan11 though, would have missed out on a good family holiday otherwise. And of course, precious time with Joash. ;-) Since his place will be on holiday next week! =D It's been some good extremely busy months for his business, so I think it's a very good break for him, and definitely a well-deserved one.

It's also been about a year since things 'happened' between us, twas around Raya last year that my posts began being filled with winks and 'someones'. It's been good so far, I've learnt so much about relationships and trying to be a good girlfriend. Haha. Trying...

Ok, this was a super random post.

:-) Have a blessed new week ahead of you, and happy raya-ing! =)

God bless,

Jo

Kuantan trip!

Mum wanted to return to 'those days' of living in Kuantan... hmm, I was a tiny kid back then but I do have some distant memories of those days...

Beach... House... Cycling... Church...

Church! Hahaha we were supposedly in the same church as Joash and family. -__-

Small small world, when I went out with Anna I found out she was staying with the pastor (in KL) of that church (at that time)! Mmmm. I like connections. :-) He's a good man, visited my dad, kept our faith going. One of the many who blessed my family at that time. =)

But naw, I really don't remember anything much. Even my memories I possess could have been fabricated from the photos I see. And I most definitely DO NOT remember Joash nor anyone from that church. Lol! I was a kid with Elective Mutism la, only friend I had back then was my brother.

Anyhow, Kuantan trip next week, just one to relax... really bad timing for me me thinks, with my guitar exam so so so darn close but that's about the only holiday my family will have... so... okay lor.

Looking forward to it, all of us are! Even the in-laws are smsing mum and asking for exact dates. Hehe. And I got a cute sms from mum-in-law talking about the trip today. =)

I'm glad we're in a relationship where there were prior ties, no awkwardness within families. Hehe. The only 'new' thing was getting to know each other as closer friends, and me thinks that was exciting. =P

Have I ever answered the question of 'how it all began' on this blog? I don't think so...

Well, keep wondering. =)

God bless,

Jo

Tostadas

Just read this.

The most innocent thing about this article:

During her interview, police said the girl was concerned that she was unable to bring the tostadas home because she had left them in the van.

Hahaha. When I was 7 and my house was broken into, I was ok about everything, the mess, the cut grill, etc. I only broke down when...

When I realised that the robbers had taken MY SCHOOL BAG. Can you imagine that?? I immediately worried about ALL my school books and how I'll have to find a way to replace them!!

I recovered in a split second when I spotted the pile of books left on a sofa. The robbers had thankfully emptied my Minnie Mouse bag to store whatever little money and jewellery they could find.

Talk about the importance of books at 7. =P

Well, books are still important to me, but I doubt I'll go crying over any stolen books now. Far more important things to worry about.

Tuition has been going fine, I've been sourcing for materials from bookshops and websites to best teach my student, and she's progressing pretty quick. :-) While searching for some word games today, I suddenly remembered what my form 3 Science teacher told us, to search for websites that can generate crossword puzzles. And I did! =) It's awesome, I can use it for practically any subject I want.

I really enjoy the academic world, and this tuition class just reinforces that fact. =) I've given tuition to people on and off since lower secondary school days, but never on a long term/fixed pay basis as I never wanted the commitment plus I've always felt too inadequate in terms of knowledge. But now the level ain't too high, and among all the subjects I'm teaching, I really enjoy teaching English. Although I daresay it's about the most complicated to teach... simply because it's ENGLISH. But it forces me to really know my stuff, and really read up on grammar rules... how to explain when to use -s, -es, or changing the form of a singular noun to plural..

Something I took for granted since young, knowing how to use these words as I've been an avid reader since my kindergarten days.. I was reading Sweet Valley Kids at 6. I remember this because I used to be a year younger than those 7 year old twins. Haha.

Even as I taught Malay today, I realised that I had to really, really backtrack and teach the very basics of the language. I barely even remember how I learnt my Malay! Lol. The primary 1 book her employer bought for her is way too hard... I realised that today after I tried to teach her from it. I'll have to source for suku kata books.

Or maybe I'll just type out my own stuff. So much more flexible, things I want to teach aren't found in one specific book, but spread out in other books.

And that, is the joy of being an educator. =) Moulding the lesson to your student's needs, having the power to teach what you want. Ah, I feel Miss Jean Brodie's power.

LOL.

;-)

The bf has been so so so busy, I haven't seen him since last Friday! Poor guy. :-( Money ain't an easy thing to make... but I've got faith that he can pull through it all. He's a very strong man. :-)

Gasing with the pilot tomolo! =D

*Feels guilty that I'm leading a Tai-Tai life while my hubby is working so hard... mmm... err, at least I bring in a little income now with my tuition, eh syg? =P Er, forget the fact that my work, not to mention income is minute as compared to yours.* I'll do the studying for the two of us k! (And the sleeping too!)

Muh sayang just called, me off to bed, have a good night! =)

God bless,
Jo

P.S. Random topics today, ain't focused!

Attended Calvary today...

Boys in Pink, Girls in Blue

Was just watching some interesting Youtube videos.. do search for 'Princess Boy' and read this article: Gender Specific Clothing for Children.

I dressed exactly like a boy last time, come to think of it. Apart from school uniforms, I never owned a skirt/dress. And if I had to act in some play and wear a skirt, I would borrow it from my trusted friend, Chow Ping. =P

I climbed trees, played sports, hated the piano, ran everywhere, walked everywhere in the scorching sun refusing to use umbrellas, never engaged in wooing and wowing over cute guy actors/singers/whatever. It felt good to be beating real men on the badminton court, felt good when they didn't treat me as 'just a girl' on court, but as a true, equally-as-strong opponent.

I wore big baggy t-shirts, loved collared-t-shirts, wore sports shorts everywhere and never owned a baby-T/tight-fitting t-shirts. Probably the only thing remotely 'feminine' about me was my long hair.

Which, come to think of it, is how my lesbian, masculine coaches dress all the time. Malls, courts, pasar malams, all the same clothing.

Hahaha.

But suffice to say, I'm surprised my parents weren't worried about me. I guess there's always been a softer side in me that you just don't see in butches, and I guess they never once even thought they may have a lesbian kid in the making.

Anyway, that's all I wanted to blog about after the videos and articles I read. :-)

I'm not lesbian although I did all that when I was younger.

I've got a real, authentic man for a boyfriend laaah. :-P

(Although so many people said he made me waaaaay more feminine than before! It's a change I'm comfortable and happy with, although I think it happened subconsciously.)

Haha! Have a blessed weekend,
Jo

Tuition!

Turns out I heard my pay for tuition wrongly. I mixed up a '-ty' for a '-teen' per hour. -__-

So now that I'm earning so much more than what I originally agreed to, I'm determined to really give it more than my best.

And honestly, it's quite fun. :-)

Just completed 4 sessions (and got paid at the end of it, which was how I realised my error in hearing the payment!) and things are progressing well. My student is a fast learner and a hard worker. :-) Now we're considering putting her through an exam in a few years time, so that she has some paper qualification.

Which also means I really need to push her. At first I thought it was just UPSR. But we (her employer and I) decided UPSR would be useless if brought back to Cambodia. So now maybe she'll take one of the UK exams. Have to find the best way to teach now, it's not play-play now that it's no longer UPSR! =P

Haha but it's fun, having a goal to achieve. :-)

And of course, the extra incentive - cash. ;-)

Take care,
Jo

P.S. Was about to go for 20s but checked my email and found out 20s is tomorrow, they're watching Captain America. Mmm..

The Apple...

Sent bro off to work, Kiara-ed, accompanied ayang to buy an iPhone, savoured lunch with him, rushed off to tuition, went to Ikano to buy some things...

Backtracking on what I said..

THE HUBBY BOUGHT AN IPHONE!!!!! HAHAHAHA! I'm still in utter disbelief. Despite my constant pestering him to buy an iPhone all this while due to the better package offered and cheap cheap rates as compared to his current plan, I never once believed that he would actually buy one.. Even if he did, I thought he just sell it off when the need arises. However, he assures me that he will not.. lol! We'll see :-D Since he wanted to embrace Celcom wholeheartedly and take a new number, he gave me the privilege of picking his number.. And it's pretty awesome a number :-P

Up to the point where we inquired about everything in the shop.. I still could not believe it. Haha!

But it's reality now, my dear man now has a phone 10x more canggih than mine, need no longer visit CCs just to check some emails, can make my bank account richer just by pressing his phone =D and oh so many uses!

Haha! I'm sounding sampat but I can't help it, tis amazing! And I think I'm more excited about it than he is, although he is pretty excited =P

On my part, I gotta change to Celcom soon ;-)

That's all for now,
Jo

P.S. I forgot to add in my last post, I also went for Jess' 21st birthday party! And it was the bomb! Lol good catching up session with old old friends... My history with Jess goes waaaaay back, click here, search for 5th April. Hahaha. That's about the fondest memory I have of her, slipping down the stairs. There was not even a need to give her a "I told you so" back then! Oh well, that made up for all the bullying I suffered at her hands... *Eh Jess, if you read this. ;-)* She used to do weird things to me and hoped I would blog about it. Ah, the good ol' 13 year old days...

P.P.S. And I also met up with my CF FES worker, my friend as she'd like to call herself. =P Was a good time of talking, good catching up. :)

P.P.P.S. Global economy is in uproar, Najib has to call for elections really really soon while there is still hope. I'd vote for our gov. this round if I could because allowing the opposition to take over now would cause utter chaos in our country and restarting every economic plan from scratch would chase away all investors, and we'll be living on drain water and drain fish while griping about the lousy job the gov. is doing. Oh, and those useful rich citizens who probably cast their vote for opposition would have run far and wide, away from our beloved country. It's my blog, my opinion. ;-)

P.P.P.P.S. I need to rush off to the bank now. Everything's a mess. Cya!

Hello Bello

What have I been up to during the hols?

Let's see.

Social-wise, it's been good meet-up sessions with some friends here and there. :-) One of the earliest with the Singaporean Andrea who can't seem to rid herself of guys chasing her, then the Kuantanian British Anna who's about my one and only friend from IPDA with whom I keep in touch with whenever she comes to KL... then... hmm hmm... Dawn, independent tough gal with plenty of thought-provoking discussions I thoroughly enjoy... Chow Ping (Gasing and Kiara kaki!), my pilot bestfriend who has lost her birthname ever since she became a pilot, she is now known as "Pilot" to most.. hmm... who else? Just had a catch-up session with some sec school CFers, Kin Ming, Aku, and Wai Yan (whom I don't really need to catch up with since I see her all the time =P).. Good dinner with bro-in-law and besan.

Who else? Hehe, the parent-in-laws, they came to KL for a short trip, had dinner with them and the other bro-in-law last Friday... Before leaving, Uncle George said, "Lemme give you a hug." HAHA! So cute! =P Loving parents, came to visit my mum before dinner. Couples like them remind me that love doesn't fade, instead it grows and matures with time if we nourish and nurture it properly. =) Something many many young people have to learn! <3

Yesterday had dinner + supper with old friends, been too long since we last met up.

Oh! And I watched "Pluck's Musical Arson" with some church friends recently. Music + comedy = my cup of tea. :-D

What else? Home church has been a very comfortable experience thus far, I've gotten to know the adults, young adults and even cute kids so so so much better. :-)

Dating-wise, I don't think we've dated properly since the last time I blogged about it.. lol! BF has been busy busy busy, but we do meet up every few days for a couple of hours whenever possible. :-) Tough life now, easy life later, eh sayang? :-) Kinda like how I used to eat the bread off sausage buns first, and save the tasty sausage for the last when I was a kid. =P

Exercise wise, been exercising more now, although I'm still rounder than last sem :-( because of the long long break. The exercise is doing me good though, I feel way more refreshed after 7/8 hours of sleep each day instead of feeling sluggish even after 12 hours of sleep before this.

Music wise, my guitar teacher has decided that I need special aural classes under a different teacher because as he says, "your aural is HORRIBLE." And "Seriously for grade 8 no more Bach for you," because I'm having so much trouble with Bourree, Bach's piece although exam is about a month away. -__- Haha, probably also because I hardly practiced last sem... *time to up practice time* Good thing is my guitar teacher has the confidence that I'll make it to grade 8... LOL.

So yeah... oh, I'm giving tuition (Math, Science, BM and English) to a Cambodian maid now! And getting paid for it. Hehehe. :-) Extra pocket money never hurt my pocket, and it's non-stressful because of level. :-)

Wow. Not too bad a list, if I may say so myself. About all I've done during the hols.

Now I'm busy deciding my subjects for next sem. :-) I really do love uni life, I feel as if I'm finally in a place where I belong. The intellectual environment, the flexibility of choosing subjects I enjoy, no more stupid school rules... it's as if I've found my calling. LOL. But seriously, after my first few weeks in uni I told bro, "This is where I belong." And after a whole year in uni, I still feel the same. No dread about going for classes, unlike school days. Despite its busyness, I still prefer uni more, although my coursemates looked at me in shock when I said I loved uni life, way more than school. Hahaha! I really do, I do I do! I have NEVER looked at young kids and wished I was back in those days. =P In fact, I pity 6+ year old kids who are about to begin their terrible journey into schooling life. Ah, uni is where I belong. :-) School has always been such a stifling, rigid and strict environment for me.

People still ask me to 'truly experience' uni life by staying away from home... I can't, my circumstances are different from most uni students. My responsibilities are completely different from most students, and living away from home now would be an absolutely selfish thing to do.. something only Joash will understand because we share the same type of heart.. and love for those around us. :-)

To the rest of the world however, let's just say I refuse to live in UM's hostel because I cannot practice my guitar there. To bring my beloved classical guitar to any hostel would be pure foolishness on my part. In my first sem I used to rush home to practice my guitar every few days, and return to hostel that very night after my practice was done. Unnecessary pressure, me thinks.

And of course, saving money! Hostel rate may be cheap but I don't want to waste my precious JPA money on it. Guitar lessons already eat up a big portion of my allowance. I don't want to live on my mum/bro's money, I wanna live on mine. Which is partly why I agreed to giving tuition on a long term basis, a lil' extra money won't hurt. :-) My family has done a big big part in bringing me up throughout my secondary school days, I do enjoy this bit of financial independence now. That being said, I still get bro to pay for my stuff most times whenever we go out though =P Hahaha! Abang maaaa... I pay for mum on and off though, when she lets me and if my purse allows it.

My sayang just called! *My day is complete.* Off to bed now, have a blessed week ahead of you!

God bless,
Jo

14th July flew by

Well, this day flew by. I was too busy with starting of uni life last year to post on the 14th of July, and somehow was too caught up with things to post this year too. Since this post...

Anyhow, life's pretty much changed since that post. That post was written when I was 18... I still wish I had the chance to fully explore the meaning of being 18, really. It's as if I skipped a phase of life every teenager is supposed to experience. Now it's too late to relive an 18 year old's life, life just will not permit it.

But anyway, well ko, life's pretty much... life these days. The up days, the down days, the joyful days, the painful days.

I do think of you many times though... you'd be 28 this year! Heck, that's OLD. =P

Anyway, looking at the current world situation these days, I just may meet you again very soon... end of the world is coming, dude! European countries are collapsing, currencies are collapsing, debts are increasing, people are working harder and harder to earn money that feeds so much less than before, earthquake after earthquake, storms that kill people...

Sometimes I look at life and just wonder.....

That aside, I visited our grandparents yesterday.. and my heart broke for them. Life's tough but my hands are tied. :-( Grandma cried again... again, I look at them, and wonder about life. Do the joyful days outweigh the painful days and memories??? Nonetheless, grandma's face lit up with joy when she saw us, and it's joy like that that perhaps convinces me that there is hope, after all.

There are times when I'm full of hopes and dreams for this life... and times when I wonder, what's the point of it all? Why bother?

However, like always, too much depends on me to ever think about giving up. Life's a race, and tiring as it may be, I've learnt resilience along the way.

Hmm, hope I've not been too depressing, ko! Life's really kinda good now, it is...

You'd like Joash, I'm sure! :-)

That's all for now, have a good time up there! :-)

Your adorable sister. ;-)

Spiritual Matters

Like every human being, I struggle with spiritual issues... based on what I see around me, what I think, how people around me act...

I see Christians lying and cheating their way through life to achieve their goals.

I see Christians who spew out vulgarities and expletives as if these were the first words they learnt.

I see Christians misusing God's name to explain their choices in life.

I see Christians flying into rages and fits of anger when circumstances make them upset.

I see Christians sneering at the happiness of others, and rejoicing at the misfortune of others.

I see Christians loving less-fortunate strangers more than their own families and friends.

I see Christians harbouring jealousy at the success of others and envying the riches of others.

I see Christians breaking nearly/all the 10 commandments without a tinge of guilt.

I see Christians lying to their loved ones without a hint of remorse.

I see Christians giving their word and promises without any intention of fulfilling them.

I see Christians going through life without a care for those hurting around them.

I see Christians fooling around with life as if there is no God.

I see Christians leaving the faith they have been brought up in simply because they see other Christians doing the above.

I see non-Christians having no qualms about joining the Christian faith because they can lead the secular life they've led all their lives, but this new life includes a ticket to heaven.

I see non-Christians having absolutely no interest in the Christian faith because their Christian friends are no different from the world.

Are YOU in any of the above?

(I've been in several of those categories many times)

I've always believed that a Christian must bear GOOD fruits (not rotten fruits like the above..) if they are truly following their faith. Whether it's fruits of the spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control) or fruits of gaining new believers (who would have joined because they see something special in you).

If you've noticed I've included lying twice.. haha, can't help it.. if it's one thing I absolutely detest, it's blatant lying. Covering up, avoiding, I'm still not so annoyed... but blatant, outright lying I CANNOT stand. Guess that's one of the traits I inherited from good ol' dad. Hehe.

Christians who constantly use God's name in explaining decisions also irritate me. I feel that you're demeaning our heavenly Father each time you use His name, especially in petty issues. Oh, and if that decision later on proves to be wrong and you yet again fumble to come up with another 'Godly' explanation to explain your newest decision to 'cover up' your previous mistake... hmmm, I know many Christians who use God's name when they wish to break-up with their partners. Guess it's a convenient reason/excuse to use so your partner cannot give you too much hell... how can God be wrong, after all? (Although if your partner isn't that strong a Christian to see right through your reasoning her/his faith may very well be deeply shaken. So please, be warned, DO NOT use this explanation unless it's mutual, and your partner can tell you the same.)

Anyway, I had a good long talk with a friend over lunch recently, and I brought up certain spiritual issues which I've been harbouring within myself for a long time. While it was a relief to finally voice it out to someone whom I could trust, I didn't receive the exact answers I was hoping for. Still, I felt good after talking to her about it. :-)

My perspectives of things have been changing, but whether to a better direction or not, I'm not sure.

Anyhow, what a speaker recently said which struck me was this: Do not look at all the faults and flaws of your leader. Because if we look at them purely through human eyes, they will NEVER measure up to our idea of a 'perfect leader'. Instead, look at them from this perspective: How can God use him/her?

Pretty true, too often I have found myself judging leaders and disrespecting their decisions because I see their human flaws and deem them incapable of leading. It's a rather tough perspective to change, but I am trying to, day by day.

Just some food for thought. =) I've been busy with some paperwork, helping translate stuff for my guitar teacher, keying in data for mum, practising guitar... Kiara!

Been going to Kiara 2/3 times a week... mum asked me, "Why you keep going??" Me: It's addictive. Once I've built up my stamina I don't want it to drop. The bf in total contrast asked, "Why not go everyday?? Why alternate days only?" Me: If I go everyday I'll start to hate it.

Hehe. I need another sport lah. Kiara is so darn boring. Although I can now jog nearly the whole 40 minutes. =D When I first started I couldn't even walk without resting. *Looking for my badminton kakis*

Have a blessed week!

God bless,

Jo

I find it...

... disgusting when I see photos or read about how children, some even toddlers, are brought to political rallies by their parents/family.

Not only do you expose a young innocent life to the (possible) dangers of a chaotic, uncontrollable situation, but you're brainwashing your kid before he/she has had a chance to decide on his/her own stands in life.

Then again, all parents brainwash their kids for something or other. haha. So that's a pretty lame argument.

Well, I still find it disgusting anyway. =P

Had a good night out with the other half yesterday, been a long time (months! Since... I really don't know when. Before my hectic gilar semester???) since we've had the chance to date like that. :-) Had dinner with the bro-in-law and besan! Hehe, good dinner, good time of fellowship.. then the both of us did some walking around, saw a movie (Hanna, the brilliant assassin!). Oh oh, and he bought me earrings! =D Round smileys! Like: =) on round shaped earrings! hehehe. Sooo cute.

Was talking to the boyfriend a few days ago... and hmm hmm guess there are things that we cannot expect our closest friends to understand about our individual lives. Because we all go through different challenges... and many a time, we're alone when in pain, when everyone around us think that our worlds are perfect and problem-free.

Especially when you're not the type to wail about your life problems to others.

*Yet another vague, confusing post by yours truly*

Last Sunday the Powerkids had a birthday celebration! And I blew 24 balloons! (Too big, they kept popping and people kept jumping during service. -_-) Haha. Oh, the simple joys of life. We had an overabundance of food for lunch as a result, so most people got to pack home plenty of food for their dinner. Hehe. I like house church plenty, the fellowship is so warm and close-knitted.. people stay to talk till 2pm+ at times! (Service ends about 11.45am... that's a good 2+ hours of fellowship!) I do miss the friends who are spread out all over in the other 3 house churches though.. feels as if I hardly see them anymore.

Have a blessed week ahead of you! =)

God bless,

Jo