Hungry!

Haha. I'm not entirely sure why I'm blogging at 4.15am in the morning..

I think it's because I've turned nocturnal, sleeping in the afternoons, and staying awake during entire nights.

Hmmm. because I've got peace and quiet in the middle of the night. I can sleep in the midst of noise, but I can't study with noise. Hehe.

And I'm hungry. :-(

I ought to sleep soon, before my parents wake up and discover I've not slept yet. Hahaha, that was the nice part of them being away for 5 weeks, I did everything without having to worry about what they thought. :-P

After attempting to study Business today.. as usual, my mind wandered around. Simply because I really didn't know what the book was talking about. Pemetakan pemasaran, penyasaran pemasaran, psikografi... I detest that subject. :-( Bad enough I dislike studying, what more to study such.. arrgh.

Oh oh, and yeah, I was thinking, the difference between studying, and training.

Training (badminton, squash-sports training lah I mean) is easier in the sense that, well, if you have a coach, you don't need to rely on yourself to improve. Haha. I don't know about those who train without coaches, I for one know I was one of the laziest cows around that could only be pushed to train hard by a coach. By myself? I never did manage to push myself past that certain threshold of pain without a coach. If I felt tired, I stopped (without a coach). A coach breathing down my neck, I stopped when told to.

Studying, on the other hand. Hahahaha. I give up LAH. Totally. I feel sleepy, I sleep. I feel tired, I rest. I feel bored, I stop. I don't understand, I give up. In studying, no one can push you. Really, it's true. At least, if my teachers are/were supposed to push me, they've failed pretty miserably. It's down to me to do well. And I'm not exactly the most disciplined, self-motivated girl around.

And unlike my younger days, I don't mind doing poorly in exams these days. I've skipped countless monthly tests in form 6, and hardly ever do my homework, didn't do some projects, and and, have been absent for 30+ days so far this year.. you know, all my years in school I've never skipped more than.. 6, 7? days of school a year. Now I'm trying not to reach 40 days! (I think I'll reach lah.)

My teachers love me though. Haha. I think so, otherwise they'll have scolded me long ago. One of the most-feared teachers (dramatic a bit la) was complaining about how dirty the classroom floor was. It was my duty to sweep the floor that day, but I've completely shirked that responsibility ever since the day I was assigned to it. She looked at the schedule, and saw my name, next to an ex-classmate who has left form 6. I braced myself for a shelling from her... but lo and behold, she started scolding the class about not changing the schedule, and leaving this classmate's name in although she's no longer around! Hahahaha. 0:-) (That's a halo on my head)

I think, it's all a result of growing up. Somehow, when you can drive around, go out whenever you want, the thought of staying home and doing your homework and studying and and being good and responsible etc. loses its appeal.

Still, nothing that an innocent face, feigned confusion, and a distraught act can't solve. :-)

4.46am now. Hmm. I'll return to my humble abode now, that's piling up with books that seem to appear from nowhere. Bed, floor, chair, desk, you name it, they are everywhere. Siiiigh.

God bless,
Jo